February 28th, 2008 - The Mythbuster of faith
Yesterday Sunshine Coast Grammar School hosted a special 30 minute service in the new school chapel, to pray for Cameron immediately before the start of the school day. It was a very thoughtful and rather emotional event attended by Ingrid, the boys and I as well as crowd of about 80 teachers, parents, friends and Maroochy Baptist church supporters. I have no doubt that everyone there was very touched by the event and I personally felt the reassuring presence of the Holy Spirit there in that place at that time. The service was led by the school chaplain, Rev. Ron Holt, who knows Cameron and has visited him a couple of times. He also delightfully refers to himself as “Revâ€. A number of people delivered lovely prayers for Cameron including Nigel Fairbairn the headmaster and a small band / choir played. It was very special. I setup the video camera at the back of the chapel and recorded the event for Cameron who watched the DVD later that day and he enjoyed every moment.
By the time I arrived in Brisbane late yesterday Cameron’s hair was beginning to show up in meals and generally starting to cover everything from clothing and furniture. A rather large bald patch was also taking shape right on the very top of his head and beginning to spread. Leigh told me that earlier while he was having treatment at oncology outpatients Cameron was entertaining the other little kids and had them in stitches with his animated “You guys are making me tear my hair out…†routine. Apparently it was hilarious as he was literally grabbing handfuls of his hair and pulling it out. Anyway, within 5 minutes of arriving at the lodge yesterday I had those invisible hairs all over my face and in my mouth and by that stage Cameron had clearly enough of the hair getting into everything and he was ready for the electric razor.
You can see the result… a solid #1. He opted out of the skin close shave so that he could have tyre tracks carved into the remaining hair with the special narrow shaving attachment that comes with the razor. In the end he decided he’d rather have the Queensland Reds logo across the back of his head. Unfortunately his hair is so blonde that the result just doesn’t show up in photographs, but he is proud of it. Shaving his head like this was far more of an emotional experience for me, as well as Leigh than for Cameron, who laughed and joked throughout the whole procedure. I think it must have been the symbolism of the event more than anything else that required us both to make a conscious effort to choke back the tears, whereas Cam now feels like he is a fully fledged member of the chemo kids’ clan when he visits the outpatients’ clinic.
Cameron still has a very nasty cough from his partially collapsed lungs, but he remains in very good spirits in spite of this and the lingering infection around the entry point in his central line, which is also responding quite well to various antibiotics. His deeper concerns, however, remain just below the surface. As he lay in bed quietly for some minutes yesterday evening, listening to one of his current favourite CDs – Nickelback – without the distractions of electronic games, etc.. he became a little tearful and said to me “Nothing will ever be the same…†I told him “Yeah, you’re right. Things won’t be the same, they will be better. Just think about how much you have to offer other sick kids right now.†He thought for a moment and as that trademark smile spread across his face he said “Yeahâ€. At that moment I realised he already knew all of that. What he needed was the same thing we all need from time to time, which is to have our beliefs, hopes and dreams independently validated.
And speaking of dreams, Cameron tells me that his ‘make a wish’ has changed from swimming with the dolphins at Seaworld to something much more ambitious… He has now decided that he wants to go on the show Mythbusters, which he has been a mega-fan of for years. When he told me this I asked “Hmm. So you want to visit the set where they make the show and see what goes on behind the scenes?†He responded with an emphatic “No. I want to go on the show.†He’s not just telling me this. He is saying it witha real aura of expectancy. What was that I said about about dream validation?
Finally, while Leigh and I were in Brisbane overnight, Ingrid became concerned about a rash on Carlton’s back. Leigh called an angel, a personal friend who is also a doctor, who left her own young family to make a house call for Carlton at 7.30pm. We learned that poor Carlton has developed a rather painful case of shingles on his back, which is directly related to stress and also somehow associated with the chicken pox virus! This introduced two disappointments today. First, none of us in the house with Carlton, including Carlton himself of course, are allowed to visit Cameron until the shingles have cleared up. Second and somewhat more distressing is the realisation that Carlton is taking enormous strain from all of this stuff going on around Cameron. He is missing Leigh and Cameron terribly and has a great deal of anxiety about the current situation, which seems to him like a dark tunnel with no light visible at the end and he is also now worrying about illness in general and everyone’s mortality. Thankfully the school (SCGS) have swung straight into action with counselling today and a schedule of regular sessions to follow until Carlton is better able to cope.
Again we are reminded to remain vigilant. We must defend our faith – keep our hearts and our minds open and receptive to the will of God. Clearly, the invasive nature of cancer is not strictly confined to the physical body of the sufferer. It is a stealthy enemy that seeks to undermine the confidence, emotional and physical well-being of those family members who bear close, sensitive attachments. But for faith it would see us all perish. Our faith however, shall see it turned upon itself. At every turn it seems we are being challenged to deal with one situation or another, for which we might otherwise feel quite unprepared and if not overwhelmed, but almost immediately one, two, five or more angels appear on the scene. They know who they are and we remain ever so grateful for their presence.
February 29th, 2008 at 12:10 am
Cameron, you are one handsome young man. You are doing so well with everything. Are you still enjoying playing the PSP? Ruby is always asking after you, and she has been on here a couple of times to read the updates. We all send our love and best wishes and know that everything will be fine. Love The Middleton family + Monty (the dog – aged 2)! We have a miniature schnauzer, who is as mad as a hatter!!
February 29th, 2008 at 12:41 am
Hey Cam very smashing your hairstyle, Uncle Gary has now competition but he has no chance as it suits you much better!!!! Kenneth has the same style he has been shaving his hair also on #1 for nearly two years now, in the beginning it was strange but now I cant imagine him with long hair. The first time he did it he was very naughty, he had long hair and he only shaved half of it and left the other half long and he did it at a friends house at night so I did not see it till he walked out his room on the sunday morning, I got such a fright, but he thought it was worth it just to see the look on my face. Boys!!! had such a laugh this morning when your mom told me what you did at the childrens ward, what a lot of fun. Take care of yourself and I hope Carlton is not feeling so bad. You can tell him I also have shingles!!!! Very unpleasant. Sleep tight and sweet dreams. love as always to all Dee Martin Manuella and Kenneth xxxx
February 29th, 2008 at 7:35 am
Dear Cam,
Your courage and strength amazes me. Seeing those lovely pictures of you, with such a fabulous smile. We may be far away but we are sharing the emotions of your journey too. You are a real inspiration to us all. Your family must be so proud of you.
Big hugs to you all – give our love to Carlton. I hope he is soon able to visit you again.
Never mind all these celebs you keep meeting, by the time those doctors have you on the mend you’ll be the famous one – all these fans you have logging onto your website!!
keep strong you are doing great.
Love and hugs to you all.
Jenny, Andy, Alex & Aimee xxxx
February 29th, 2008 at 7:34 pm
Hi Cameron,
Wow dont you look fantastic!!! What a cool dude! We are reading about your update, and everytime we are just so inspired by you! You are doing so well, we know that you are so strong – so positive, good for you I am sure you will be on Mythbusters very, very soon.
Your daddy is doing such a good job with keeping us all updated, so give him a big hug and a pat on the back from all of your ‘fans’, sure all the fans are nodding in approval!!!!
Keep well sweatheart, know that Ross and Seb is praying for you everynight.
All my love Monique x
February 29th, 2008 at 10:51 pm
aloha there my number one in shaving his hair!! My mom told me about your entertainment for the kids at the ward!! Hilarious mate!! Carlton my lil surfer dude… stay high spirited those shingles are nasty i knw my mums got em!!!! When i come over to visit u guys i’ll be Cam’s chauffeur and u owen and i can hit some waves and chill on the beach!! Gve your mom gran and bill a hug from me!! Lotsa love frm the mountains manuella xoxo
March 2nd, 2008 at 11:44 am
Hello Cameron,
Wow, you look great! Sorry to miss out seeing you last week but will see you soon! I do hope Carlton feels better soon too!
I thought, I would send you a “Limericks”, with a slight British feel!
Short Visit, Long Stay:
The school trip was a special occasion
But we never reached our destination
Instead of the Zoo
I was locked in the loo
On the M62 Service Station!!!
Paul Cookson.
with much love and get well wishesxx
Karen & Co xxxx